Questions by Aaron M.

Is the human drive to succeed based on the need to be accepted and approved of by society? If so does that make me an insecure person who feels validated by the approval and admiration of others? Does that explain why I’m such an incurable flirt?
To stroke my ego and remind myself of my redeeming values?
Am I subconsciously suicidal? Are we all? Or how else do you explain the mild urge to jump off a high place? & despite my fear of heights, why am I DRAWN to high places? Could it simply be an expression of every man’s innate desire – To fly?
Why is life a series of unquenchable thirsts? First the thirst for comfort, which grows into the thirst for material gain, & when we achieve a degree of that, we find there’s little satisfaction in it.
Next we find Love & it temporarily fills a vacuum in our lives, and just when you’re about to heave a sigh of relief, you realize that your satisfaction has sensitized you to another thirst – Security – Will your love last? Is even the life you live guaranteed? Are you sure of your next breath? Will the love of your life wake up tomorrow morning? Will the stock market crash? At this point the need for protection sets in. eventually your eyes see the futility of physical protection and you discover – Religion – Now this is no easy task (any religion for that matter!), requires discipline, and who knows better than you and I how suited to indiscipline we humans are?
So I ask myself, why are we humans so unreliable? Or better still, why is so much expected of the sons of men? (Who seem to be the weakest link in this all important spiritual game?)
Well, still on the subject of letdowns and fuckups, do you remember the way you felt when you found out the tooth fairy and Santa Claus don’t really exist?
Did you cry? I did. And I still do, every time the fabric of my illusions are ripped away from me and I find myself lying naked on the floor.(floor, you ask? Well don’t you think it apt, as every time we lose our illusions we’re said to come Down to Earth!? HAHA!)
I’m still looking for answers, and I know I’ll never find them all, but with the few I have I’ll be able to sleep at night with the rags of my illusions for my quilt and the love of life for my pillow, and I know I’ll have the strength to endure life’s unquenchable thirsts.
Aaron M.